Rouge Midget/Walkthrough

You'll first have to connect your Sinclair ZX Spectrum and cassette recorder to your television set, then switch all three of them on; once you have done so you will have to insert the cassette for The Guild's 1991 text adventure game Rouge Midget into the recorder, type LOAD "" (without leaving a space between the quotes), and press Enter to load the program into the console. After the title screen animation, the game will proceed to the start screen shown above (however, in the actual Red Dwarf series, Holly the computer was male from his inception in 1987 to 1988, and again from 1997 to 1999).

Once you have pressed any key to continue, the game will proceed to the second start screen shown above; once you have pressed any key again, the game shall start in the Scutters' Rest Room. If you type in INFO and press Enter during gameplay the following text shall be displayed on the screen:

Some commands recognized by this game, EAT DRINK TALK SALUTE GET DROP GIVE INSERT EXAMINE KILL USE WASH MEND THROW TOW WAKE WATCH KICK CHARGE TYPE SHOOT FLY LAND POUR In addition to these, some abreviations are E(X)amine, (G)et, (L)ook, (N)orth, (E)ast, (S)outh, (W)east, (U)p and (D)own

The misspellings of "abbreviations" and "(W)est" are also accurate, as are any other spelling mistakes you may possibly notice further down this page.

You are in the Scutters rest room, patches of oil blemish the steel floor and recharge sockets are set into the wall. Exits lead:- E I'm waiting... UNPLUG SCUTTER Ok, the Scutter unplugs himself, and the lead recoils into the socket. Your turn... E

You are in a metal corridor. Exits lead:- N S E W Enter your command. S

You're in a long metal corridor. Exits lead:- N E S W You can also see:- A broken food dispenser. I'm waiting... S

You are travelling along a bare corridor. Exits lead:- N E S Your turn... E

You are in store room C2. Exits lead:- W You can also see:- A small trailer. What now? TAKE TRAILER Okay. I'm waiting... W

You are travelling along a bare corridor. Exits lead:- N E S Your turn... S

You're at the southern end of a ''long corridor. Set into the'' south wall you can see a power socket. Exits lead:- N E W Enter your command. E

''You're in the trash room. Heaps'' of rubbish lie piled on the floor and against the walls. Exits lead:- W I'm waiting... EXAMINE TRASH Amongst the rubbish you find a short length of string. Your turn... TAKE STRING Okay. Your turn... W

You're at the southern end of a ''long corridor. Set into the'' south wall you can see a power socket. Exits lead:- N E W I'm waiting... N

You are travelling along a bare corridor. Exits lead:- N E S What now? N

You're in a long metal corridor. Exits lead:- N E S W You can also see:- A broken food dispenser. I'm waiting... N

You are in a metal corridor. Exits lead:- N S E W Enter your command. N

You're at the northern end of ''the corridor. A sign painted on'' the wall reads "STORES LEVEL". Exits lead:- E S W What now? W

''You're in an express lift. Three'' buttons protrude from the wall to the side of the sliding door. Exits lead:- OUT Enter your command. PRESS 1 The doors slide quietly shut and with a barely noticable shudder, ''the lift moves off. A loud ping'' announces that you have reached your destination and the doors open once more. Press any key to continue

''You're in an express lift. Three'' buttons protrude from the wall to the side of the sliding door. Exits lead:- OUT What now? OUT

You're at the northern end of a ''long metal corridor. A sign has'' been painted onto one wall. Exits lead:- S W I'm waiting... S

You're in a long metal corridor. Rooms lie off the corridor on either side. Exits lead:- N E S W Enter your command. S

You're in a long metal corridor. Exits lead:- N S W You can also see:- Rimmer. What now? SALUTE RIMMER Your Scutter executes a Full Rimmer using the three joints in its arm to total capability. Rimmer immediatly copies your salute, and at the end of the full three arm-circles, hits himself smartly on the forehead, knocking himself out cold. What now? EXAMINE RIMMER He's lying in a crumpled heap upon the floor - and yes you do find something interesting. The Scutter finds something. What now? TAKE COIN Okay. What now? N

You're in a long metal corridor. Rooms lie off the corridor on either side. Exits lead:- N E S W I'm waiting... W

You're in accomodation block A1. A bunk is set into an alcove in one of the walls. Exits lead:- E I'm waiting... EXAMINE BUNK The bunk hasn't been used for some time, but peeling back the sheets you find something. What now? TAKE BOOK Okay. I'm waiting... E

You're in a long metal corridor. Rooms lie off the corridor on either side. Exits lead:- N E S W I'm waiting... S

You're in a long metal corridor. Exits lead:- N S W You can also see:- An unconscious Rimmer. What now? S

You're in a long metal corridor. Exits lead:- N E S W Your turn... W

''You're in Cat's room. The whole'' place is decorated in impeccable taste and is easily the most luxurious room in the whole ''ship. A giant walk-in wardrobe'' is to the south. Exits lead:- E S You can also see:- Cat. Your turn... S

You're in Cat's giant wardrobe, quality clothes of all fashions hang in their cellophane wrappers. Exits lead:- N S Your turn... S

''You're in Cat's wardrobe. The'' rows of clothes seem to go on forever. Exits lead:- N S You can also see:- A pair of magnetic boots. What now? TAKE BOOTS Okay. Enter your command. N

You're in Cat's giant wardrobe, quality clothes of all fashions hang in their cellophane wrappers. Exits lead:- N S Your turn... N

''You're in Cat's room. The whole'' place is decorated in impeccable taste and is easily the most luxurious room in the whole ''ship. A giant walk-in wardrobe'' is to the south. Exits lead:- E S You can also see:- Cat. Your turn... E

You're in a long metal corridor. Exits lead:- N E S W I'm waiting... N

You're in a long metal corridor. Exits lead:- N S W You can also see:- An unconscious Rimmer. I'm waiting... W

You are in a short metal ''corridor. A sign above your head'' swings slowly in the slight breeze created by the airconditioning. Exits lead:- E W What now? WEAR BOOTS You fix the boots to the side of your Scutter. Your turn... W

You're at the southern end of ''the zero-g football pitch. The'' white painted lines mark out the various positions and score lines on the floor, walls and ceiling. Exits lead:- N E Your turn... N

You're at the northern end of ''the zero-g football pitch. A small'' passageway leads off north behind the net. Exits lead:- N S Enter your command. N

You're in a small room to the ''north of the football pitch. It'' would seem to be some sort of tool store. Exits lead:- S You can also see:- A tool-roll. Your turn... TAKE ROLL Okay. Your turn... S

You're at the northern end of ''the zero-g football pitch. A small'' passageway leads off north behind the net. Exits lead:- N S I'm waiting... S

You're at the southern end of ''the zero-g football pitch. The'' white painted lines mark out the various positions and score lines on the floor, walls and ceiling. Exits lead:- N E Your turn... E

You are in a short metal ''corridor. A sign above your head'' swings slowly in the slight breeze created by the airconditioning. Exits lead:- E W I'm waiting... DROP BOOTS I'm waiting... E

You're in a long metal corridor. Exits lead:- N S W You can also see:- An unconscious Rimmer. I'm waiting... N

You're in a long metal corridor. Exits lead:- N E S W Enter your command. E

You're in accomodation block B1. This is Lister and Rimmer's ''room. You can see a Bunk, a Table'' and a Wardrobe. Exits lead:- W You can also see:- Lister. A fishtank. I'm waiting... EXAMINE WARDROBE You open the wardrobe and have a ''quick look inside. A long row of'' military blue underpants hang in cellophane wrappers from the bar The Scutter finds something. What now? TAKE PIZZA Okay. I'm waiting... GIVE BOOK Lister takes the book and stows it away within his clothing. What now? TAKE LISTER Lister climbs into the trailer and slumps down, closing his eyes. Your turn... W

You're in a long metal corridor. Exits lead:- N E S W What now? N

You're at the northern end of a ''long metal corridor. A sign has'' been painted onto one wall. Exits lead:- S W Enter your command. W

''You're in an express lift. Three'' buttons protrude from the wall to the side of the sliding door. Exits lead:- OUT Your turn... PRESS 2 The doors slide quietly shut and with a barely noticable shudder, ''the lift moves off. A loud ping'' announces that you have reached your destination and the doors open once more. Press any key to continue

''You're in an express lift. Three'' buttons protrude from the wall to the side of the sliding door. Exits lead:- OUT I'm waiting... OUT

You're at the northern end of ''the corridor. A sign painted on'' the wall reads "STORES LEVEL". Exits lead:- E S W What now? S

You are in a metal corridor. Exits lead:- N S E W Your turn... S

You're in a long metal corridor. Exits lead:- N E S W You can also see:- A broken food dispenser. Your turn... GIVE TOOLS Lister takes the tool-roll, and using some spanners from it, fumbles around in the dispenser before wandering away towards the Kopokabana beach bar. What now? INSERT COIN The dispenser takes your coin, and squirts a thick sluge into a plastic cup which you take. Your turn... N

You are in a metal corridor. Exits lead:- N S E W I'm waiting... N

You're at the northern end of ''the corridor. A sign painted on'' the wall reads "STORES LEVEL". Exits lead:- E S W Your turn... W

''You're in an express lift. Three'' buttons protrude from the wall to the side of the sliding door. Exits lead:- OUT What now? PRESS 1 The doors slide quietly shut and with a barely noticable shudder, ''the lift moves off. A loud ping'' announces that you have reached your destination and the doors open once more. Press any key to continue

''You're in an express lift. Three'' buttons protrude from the wall to the side of the sliding door. Exits lead:- OUT I'm waiting... OUT

You're at the northern end of a ''long metal corridor. A sign has'' been painted onto one wall. Exits lead:- S W Your turn... S

You're in a long metal corridor. Rooms lie off the corridor on either side. Exits lead:- N E S W What now? E

You're in accomodation block B1. This is Lister and Rimmer's ''room. You can see a Bunk, a Table'' and a Wardrobe. Exits lead:- W You can also see:- A fishtank. I'm waiting... EXAMINE TABLE On the table, amongst various empty take-away containers and crumpled newspapers, you find a motor. I'm waiting... TAKE MOTOR Okay. What now? EXAMINE FISHTANK In the murky green waters you can just see a plastic Vatican and McCartney, Listers pet android goldfish swimming backwards. Your turn... PUSH FISHTANK You push the fishtank back and forth until all the water slops out over the side. What now? EXAMINE FISHTANK You can see the fish flapping about in the bottom of the tank. Your turn... TAKE FISH Okay. You take the goldfish out of the empty tank. Your turn... W

You're in a long metal corridor. Rooms lie off the corridor on either side. Exits lead:- N E S W Your turn... S

You're in a long metal corridor. Exits lead:- N S W You can also see:- An unconscious Rimmer. Your turn... S

You're in a long metal corridor. Exits lead:- N E S W What now? W

''You're in Cat's room. The whole'' place is decorated in impeccable taste and is easily the most luxurious room in the whole ''ship. A giant walk-in wardrobe'' is to the south. Exits lead:- E S You can also see:- Cat. Your turn... WAKE CAT You shake Cat into wakefullness, and he sees the little android ''goldfish you are carrying. He'' springs to his paws and takes it out of your trailer. "I'm gonna eat you little fishie I'm gonna eat you little fishie  I'm gonna eat you little fishie  '' 'Cause I like eating fish." he'' chants before biting into the gold body of the tiny droid. ''"Oooowwweeeee!!!" he screams as'' his tooth breaks on the hard ''insides. The tooth lands at your'' wheels and Cat runs out of the door in agony. Your turn... TAKE TOOTH Okay. Enter your command. TIE STRING You thread the string through the tooth and join the ends together. Enter your command. WEAR TOOTH Okay, you hang the tooth and string around your neck. Enter your command. S

You're in Cat's giant wardrobe, quality clothes of all fashions hang in their cellophane wrappers. Exits lead:- N S What now? S

''You're in Cat's wardrobe. The'' rows of clothes seem to go on forever. Exits lead:- N S What now? EXAMINE CLOTHES Between the satin flares and kipper ties (were they EVER in fashion?) you find a blasterzoid. Enter your command. TAKE BLASTERZOID Okay. I'm waiting... N

You're in Cat's giant wardrobe, quality clothes of all fashions hang in their cellophane wrappers. Exits lead:- N S Your turn... N

''You're in Cat's room. The whole'' place is decorated in impeccable taste and is easily the most luxurious room in the whole ''ship. A giant walk-in wardrobe'' is to the south. Exits lead:- E S Your turn... E

You're in a long metal corridor. Exits lead:- N E S W What now? S

You're at the southern end of a ''long corridor. A drinks'' dispenser stands against one wall. Exits lead:- N E Enter your command. KICK DISPENSER That seems to have done the trick, a can of something rolls out of the chute and plops onto the floor. Your turn... TAKE CAN Okay. I'm waiting... N

You're in a long metal corridor. Exits lead:- N E S W Your turn... N

You're in a long metal corridor. Exits lead:- N S W You can also see:- An unconscious Rimmer. Enter your command. N

You're in a long metal corridor. Rooms lie off the corridor on either side. Exits lead:- N E S W Your turn... N

You're at the northern end of a ''long metal corridor. A sign has'' been painted onto one wall. Exits lead:- S W Your turn... W

''You're in an express lift. Three'' buttons protrude from the wall to the side of the sliding door. Exits lead:- OUT I'm waiting... PRESS 2 The doors slide quietly shut and with a barely noticable shudder, ''the lift moves off. A loud ping'' announces that you have reached your destination and the doors open once more. Press any key to continue

''You're in an express lift. Three'' buttons protrude from the wall to the side of the sliding door. Exits lead:- OUT What now? OUT

You're at the northern end of ''the corridor. A sign painted on'' the wall reads "STORES LEVEL". Exits lead:- E S W What now? S

You are in a metal corridor. Exits lead:- N S E W Enter your command. S

You're in a long metal corridor. Exits lead:- N E S W You can also see:- A mended food dispenser. I'm waiting... S

You are travelling along a bare corridor. Exits lead:- N E S I'm waiting... S

You're at the southern end of a long ''corridor. Set into the south'' wall you can see a power socket. Exits lead:- N E W Your turn... CHARGE BLASTERZOID You plug the blasterzoid into the socket and wait until the green light goes out before unplugging it again. DA-DA, fully charged. I'm waiting... N

You are travelling along a bare corridor. Exits lead:- N E S I'm waiting... N

You're in a long metal corridor. Exits lead:- N E S W You can also see:- A mended food dispenser. What now? W

You're in a small alcove off the ''main corridor. To the south lies'' a stasis booth. Exits lead:- E IN I'm waiting... IN

''You're in a stasis booth. White'' light surrounds you on all sides A small button is the only thing to interrupt the sheerness of the walls. Exits lead:- OUT What now? PRESS BUTTON You press the button and wait for something exciting to ''happen. Presently the slice of'' pizza starts to change, great big blobs of cheese start to bubble and twist into strange ''shapes. Smoke starts to rise,'' obscuring your vision. When it clears, a terrifying monster of huge proportions has ''mutated from the pizza. It waves'' it a pair of massive pincers at you threateningly. What now? THROW CAN You throw the lager with impressive accuracy at the jaws of the salvering monster. The monster pops the can with ease showering itself with cool lager, making it steam and hiss as it melts into a large pool of squidgy cheese. You notice something. What now? TAKE SPOTLIGHT You take the spotlight and fix it into position at the front of your Scutter. Your turn... OUT

You're in a small alcove off the ''main corridor. To the south lies'' a stasis booth. Exits lead:- E IN What now? E

You're in a long metal corridor. Exits lead:- N E S W You can also see:- A mended food dispenser. Your turn... N

You are in a metal corridor. Exits lead:- N S E W What now? N

You're at the northern end of ''the corridor. A sign painted on'' the wall reads "STORES LEVEL". Exits lead:- E S W What now? W

''You're in an express lift. Three'' buttons protrude from the wall to the side of the sliding door. Exits lead:- OUT I'm waiting... PRESS 3 The doors slide quietly shut and with a barely noticable shudder, ''the lift moves off. A loud ping'' announces that you have reached your destination and the doors open once more. Press any key to continue

''You're in an express lift. Three'' buttons protrude from the wall to the side of the sliding door. Exits lead:- OUT Your turn... OUT

You're at the northern end of a ''long corridor. A sign painted on'' the wall reads "WORKSHOP AREA". To the south all the lights seem to have failed as all is dark. Exits lead:- S W Your turn... S

You're in a dark corridor, your head-light shines ahead of you powerfully. Exits lead:- N S Your turn... S

You're head-light lights up a long corridor stretching out in front of you. Exits lead:- N You can also see:- A huge metal door to the south. What now? SHOOT DOOR ZZZAPP goes the blaster, utterly destroying the door, blowing it into millions of tiny pieces. What now? S

You,re in a long metal corridor. Your head-light cuts a swath through the darkness. Exits lead:- N S W I'm waiting... W

You're in the Scutters workshop. Patches of oil, ramps and racks of tools fill the floor and walls of this room. Exits lead:- E You can also see:- A broken Scutter. I'm waiting... EXAMINE SCUTTER You notice that it is permanantly mounted with an ''unlocking device. You also'' notice that it is broken. Enter your command. INSERT MOTOR The motor fits snugly into the Scutters engine bay and you make ''all the connections. You press'' the operating switch and the Scutter lifts up its claws before scooting off to do its work. I'm waiting... E

You,re in a long metal corridor. Your head-light cuts a swath through the darkness. Exits lead:- N S W What now? N

You're head-light lights up a long corridor stretching out in front of you. Exits lead:- N You can also see:- that the corridor continues to. the south. I'm waiting... N

You're in a dark corridor, your head-light shines ahead of you powerfully. Exits lead:- N S Enter your command. N

You're at the northern end of a ''long corridor. A sign painted on'' the wall reads "WORKSHOP AREA". To the south all the lights seem to have failed as all is dark. Exits lead:- S W What now? W

''You're in an express lift. Three'' buttons protrude from the wall to the side of the sliding door. Exits lead:- OUT I'm waiting... PRESS 2 The doors slide quietly shut and with a barely noticable shudder, ''the lift moves off. A loud ping'' announces that you have reached your destination and the doors open once more. Press any key to continue

''You're in an express lift. Three'' buttons protrude from the wall to the side of the sliding door. Exits lead:- OUT Enter your command. OUT

You're at the northern end of ''the corridor. A sign painted on'' the wall reads "STORES LEVEL". Exits lead:- E S W What now? S

You are in a metal corridor. Exits lead:- N S E W What now? S

You're in a long metal corridor. Exits lead:- N E S W You can also see:- A mended food dispenser. Your turn... S

You are travelling along a bare corridor. Exits lead:- N E S I'm waiting... S

You're at the southern end of a long ''corridor. Set into the south'' wall you can see a power socket. Exits lead:- N E W Your turn... W

''You're in the locker room. Rows'' of steel lockers fill this room like scores of soldiers all standing to attention. Exits lead:- E You can also see:- An unlocked locker. I'm waiting... EXAMINE LOCKER Inside the locker you find a mop I'm waiting... TAKE MOP Okay. I'm waiting... E

You're at the southern end of a long ''corridor. Set into the south'' wall you can see a power socket. Exits lead:- N E W Your turn... N

You are travelling along a bare corridor. Exits lead:- N E S Enter your command. N

You're in a long metal corridor. Exits lead:- N E S W You can also see:- A mended food dispenser. I'm waiting... N

You are in a metal corridor. Exits lead:- N S E W I'm waiting... N

You're at the northern end of ''the corridor. A sign painted on'' the wall reads "STORES LEVEL". Exits lead:- E S W Your turn... E

''You are in a small room. A metal'' plaque can be seen set into the floor. Exits lead:- W Your turn...'' EXAMINE PLAQUE You can't make out the words, thick dirt covers them. Your turn... CLEAN PLAQUE You give the plaque a good wash with the SSM. Your turn... EXAMINE PLAQUE Ah, that's better, the washed words clearly read, 1577 Enter your command. W

You're at the northern end of ''the corridor. A sign painted on'' the wall reads "STORES LEVEL". Exits lead:- E S W Your turn... W

''You're in an express lift. Three'' buttons protrude from the wall to the side of the sliding door. Exits lead:- OUT What now? PRESS 3 The doors slide quietly shut and with a barely noticable shudder, ''the lift moves off. A loud ping'' announces that you have reached your destination and the doors open once more. Press any key to continue

''You're in an express lift. Three'' buttons protrude from the wall to the side of the sliding door. Exits lead:- OUT I'm waiting... OUT

You're at the northern end of a ''long corridor. A sign painted on'' the wall reads "WORKSHOP AREA". To the south all the lights seem to have failed as all is dark. Exits lead:- S W I'm waiting... S

You're in a dark corridor, your head-light shines ahead of you powerfully. Exits lead:- N S Enter your command. S

You're head-light lights up a long corridor stretching out in front of you. Exits lead:- N You can also see:- that the corridor continues to. the south. Your turn... S

Your head-light cuts a swath through the darkness. Exits lead:- N S W I'm waiting... S

You're at the southern end of a ''long corridor. A large door is'' recessed into the eastern wall. Next to the door is a small key- pad. Exits lead:- N I'm waiting... TYPE 1577 "Code accepted" drawls the keypad as the door slides back. I'm waiting... E

You are in the south-western corner of the main hanger bay. Exits lead:- N E W Your turn... E

You are half-way along the southern wall of the huge main hanger bay. Exits lead:- N E W I'm waiting... N

You are by the northern wall of ''the main hanger. A small passage'' leads off to the north. Exits lead:- N E S W I'm waiting... N

You are in the hanger control room a large control panel lies before you. Exits lead:- S You can also see:- some lights flashing on the panel. What now? EXAMINE PANEL The top cover has been removed for some reason, leaving the electrical circuits exposed. Your turn... POUR SOUP You pour the soup over the panel causing the circuits to crackle ''and pop as they short out. A'' pall of smoke begins to rise from the panel and you hear a swishing noise to the south. Your turn... S

You are by the northern wall of ''the main hanger. A small passage'' leads off to the north. Exits lead:- N E S W Your turn... S

You are half-way along the southern wall of the huge main hanger bay. Exits lead:- N E W What now? E

You are at the south-eastern ''corner of the main hanger. To the'' east are a pair of massive ''sliding doors. Parked rather'' clumsily just inside the doors, is a Starbug. Exits lead:- N W IN You can also see:- that the huge doors are open. What now? IN

''You are in the Starbug. The'' cramped luggage area doesn't leave much room for movement. Exits lead:- E OUT I'm waiting... E

You are in the front of the ''Starbug. A baffling array of'' controls and dials including twelve gear levers, fill most ''of the available room here. You'' also notice a large pair of red fluffy dice hanging from the rear-view mirror. Exits lead:- W What now? FLY STARBUG You make a perfect take off, this must be your lucky day. Press any key to continue

You are flying the Starbug, having left the Rouge Midget some hours ago, you have come across a planet around which you are now orbiting. Exits lead:- ??? I'm waiting... LAND STARBUG You make a perfect touch-down. Press any key to continue

''Well done!! You did it!'' Who'd have thought that a lowly Scutter could've managed such a ''difficult task. Looking around'' you can see the hundreds of different models of Scutters that have, over the years, made their way to Scutter Heaven. You look forward to being waited on claw and foot by adoring humans. Even now you ponder, the Rouge Midget will probably have been smashed beyond recognition by ''the asteroid belt. Ha Ha'' You have taken XXX turns. THAT'S IT FOLKS Do you wish to play again?

XXX shall be the number of moves it took you to finish the game (and if you followed this page exactly, it will be the minimum of 174); if you answer YES when the game asks you if you wish to play again, the game will start again, but if you answer NO, it will say Oh go on then, I don't care., then terminate.